kunvare rehne ki shapath (virginity pledge) lene ka matlab hai, shaadi se pehle sex na karne ka vaada karna, fir chahe yah vaada likhkar kiya jaaye ya bolkar.

kunvare rehne ki shapath lena 1990 ke dashak mein charcha mein aaya tha. amreeka mein dakshini baptist church ki ek sabha mein ‘sachcha pyar intazar karta hai’ naam ka ek abhiyan shuroo kiya gaya. ismein naujavanon ko bible ke usoolon aur unke doston ki kahi achhi baaton se badhava diya gaya ki woh shaadi se pehle shaareerik sambandh na rakhein.

iske baad jald hi, ek aur aisa kaaryakram shuroo hua jismein haazir honevalon mein se kai logon ne yah shapath li. unhein chaandi ki ek-ek angoothi the gayi jo is baat ki nishani thi (aur unhein yaad dilati thi) ki unhein shaadi se pehle shaareerik sambandh nahin rakhne hain.

javab is par nirbhar karta hai ki aap yah saval kisse poochhte hain.

• christine c. kim aur robert rector naam ke khojkartaon ke mutabik, “kai survey liye gaye jinse pata chala ki jin naujavanon ne yah shapath li thi unmein se zyadatar ne shaadi se pehle sex nahin kiya ya fir woh bahot lambe samay tak apni shapath par bane rahe.”

• gutmakar sanstha dvara chhaapi gayi ek kitab ke mutabik adhyan se pata chala hai ki “jo naujavan kunvare rehne ki shapath lete hain, woh bhi unki tarah sex karte hain jo shapath nahin lete.”

alag-alag nateeje kyon?

• kuch survey mein shapath lenevalon ki tulna aise naujavanon se ki jaati hai jo shaadi se pehle sex ko galat nahin maante.

• jabki kuch sarve mein shapath lenevalon ki tulna aise naujavanon se ki jaati hai jinhonne shapath to nahin li, fir bhi woh maante hain ki shaadi se pehle sex karna galat hai.

doosre sarve se kya zahir hota hai? doctor janet rosenbaum naujavanon ki swasthya visheshagya hain, woh kehti hain ki paanch saal baad, “shapath lenevalon aur shapath na lenevalon mein koi fark nahin reh jaata kyonki donon hi shaareerik sambandh rakhte hain.”

kunvare rehne ki shapath lene ke abhiyan achhe irade ke saath chalaye jaate hain. lekin samasya yah hai ki woh naujavanon mein aise gun nahin badhate jinse woh apni shapath par bane rahein. bahot-se log jo kunvare rehne ki shapath lete hain, unke baare mein doctor rosenbaum kehti hain ki woh aisa “atal irade ke saath nahin karte. agar ek insan shaadi se pehle sex na karne ka faisla karta hai to uske andar atal irada hona chahiye, jo kisi abhiyan mein hissa lene se nahin aata.”

bible badhava deti hai ki ek insan mein atal irada tab hoga jab woh “apni sochne-samajhne ki shakti ka istemal karte-karte, sahi-galat mein fark karne ke liye ise prashikshit” karega. yah irada sirf shapath lene ya use likhne se nahin aata. (ibraniyon 5:14) shaadi se pehle shaareerik sambandh na rakhne ka irada isliye nahin kiya jaana chahiye taaki hum beemari aur anchahe garbh se bach sakein, balki isliye kiya jaana chahiye kyonki isse hum shaadi ki shurooat karnevale parmeshvar ka aadar kar rahe honge.—matti 5:19; 19:4-6.

bible mein diye star hamari bhalai ke liye hain. (yashayah 48:17) beshak, kisi bhi umra ke log parmeshvar ki yah aagya maanne ka pakka faisla kar sakte hain, “vyabhichar se door bhaago.” (1 kurinthiyon 6:18) aise mein jab woh aage chalkar shaadi karte hain, to woh pati-patni ke rishte ke sukh ka poori tarah anubhav kar paate hain aur unhein woh chinta ya pachhtava nahin hota, jo shaadi se pehle sex karnevalon ko hota hai.