Achinyamata Akufunsa Kuti  . . .

Kodi Anthu Amtima Wapachala Ndingachite Nawo Bwanji?

“Anali atakwiya mosati n’kugwirika. Ndikukhulupirira kuti ankafuna kundimenya chifukwa chakuti anangondipezerera poti ndine mwana. Ndinam’funsa kwinaku ndikubwerera chafutambuyo kuti: ‘Kodi ukufuna kundimenyeranji? Taima kaye! Ndikuti taima kaye! Inetu Sindinakulakwire chilichonse. Kodi n’chifukwa chiyani ukufuna kundimenya? Sindikudziŵa n’komwe chimene chakukwiyitsa. Tatiye tingokambirana basi,’” anatero David mnyamata wa zaka 16.

KODI munayambanapo ndi munthu wina wokonda kumenya anzake? Baibulo linalosera kuti masiku ano anthu adzakhala ‘aukali, osakonda zabwino.’ (2 Timoteo 3:3) Ndipo ngakhale mutayesetsadi kupeŵa ‘kuyanjana ndi munthu aliyense wokwiya msanga . . ., waukali,’ nthaŵi zina sizingatheke kuwapeŵeratu anthu a mtima wapachala. (Miyambo 22:24) Kodi muyenera kutani mukakumana ndi zotere?

Mmene Mungachitire ndi Anthu Aukali

Masiku ano achinyamata ambiri amati akakumana ndi anthu aukali, nawonso amakalipa. Koma potero amangoipitsa zinthu kwambiri. Komanso munthu akalephera kuugwira mtima wake, ndiye kuti amangofanana ndi munthu amene wakalipayo. Lemba la Miyambo 26:4 limati: “Usayankhe chitsiru monga mwa utsiru wake, kuti ungafanane nacho iwe wekha.” Mnyamata wina wotchewa Jeremy anadziŵa kuti mawu aŵa ndi oona atakumana kaye ndi zowawa. Iye akukumbukira motere zimene zinachitika tsiku lina ali patebulo yodyera kusukulu: “Panali kagulu ka anyamata ena ake amene ankakonda kugemulana okhaokha ndiponso kugemula anzawo. Nthaŵi zambiri ankagemula ineyo koma ndinalibe nazo ntchito. Koma mnyamata wina atayamba kutchula zokhudza amayi anga, ndinalephera kuugwira mtima ndipo ndinam’kalipira mosabisa chicheŵa.” Zitatero, kodi n’chiyani chinachitika? Jeremy akuti, “Mnyamatayu anandimenya molapitsa.”

Baibulo limapereka malangizo anzeru aŵa: “Mayankhidwe ofatsa abweza mkwiyo; koma mau owawitsa aputa msunamo.” (Miyambo 15:1) Inde, kubwezera munthu wa mtima wapachala pomuuza “mawu owawitsa” kumangomukwiyitsa kwambiri munthuyo. Koma kuyankha mofatsa nthaŵi zambiri kumaziziritsa zinthu n’kukhazikitsa anthu mitima pansi.

Kumbukirani nkhani ya David uja tam’tchula poyamba paja. Iye anakambirana ndi mnyamata wokonda zomenya anzake uja kuti alongosole chimene chinam’kwiyitsa. Ndiye anatulukira kuti winawake anali atam’bera chakudya chake, motero pamenepa anali kuthera ukali wake pa iyeyo chifukwa chakuti anali munthu woyamba kukumana naye. David anam’thandiza maganizo mnyamatayo pomuuza kuti, “Ukandimenya si ndiye kuti upeza chakudya chakocho.” Kenaka  anamuuza kuti bwanji apitire limodzi kukhitchini. David anati: “Chifukwa chakuti mkulu wopereka chakudya kukhitchini ndinkadziŵana naye, ndinam’pezera chakudya china mnyamata wovuta uja. Ndiye anandigwira chanza ndipo kuyambira pamenepo anayamba kugwirizana nane.” Kodi mukuona pankhaniyi kuti mawu ofatsa n’ngamphamvudi? Mwambi wina unanenadi zoona kuti, “Lilime lofatsa lithyola fupa.”—Miyambo 25:15.

Kodi Kufatsa Kumasonyeza Mantha Kapena Chamuna?

N’zoona kuti mwina simungakonde kukhala munthu wa “lilime lofatsa.” Mwina mumaganiza kuti wina akamakalipa kum’bwezera ndiko chamuna. Mungaopenso kuti mukakhala wofatsa anzanu angayambe kuganiza kuti ndinu wamantha. Koma kodi kufatsa kumatanthauza chiyani kwenikweni? Buku lina limati, kufatsa kumatanthauza kudekha. Komabe buku lomweli limapitiriza kunena kuti: “Chimachititsa kudekha kumeneku ndicho chamuna chenicheni.” Motero, kufatsa si mantha ayi, koma kungasonyeze chamuna. Kodi kungatero motani?

Chifukwa choyamba n’chakuti, munthu wofatsa amakhala wokhazikika maganizo ndipo satekeseka msanga ndi zinthu. Koma munthu wosafatsa sakhazikika maganizo, sachedwa kukhumudwa, mwinanso amakhala wovutitsa. Iye samathanso kudziletsa. Chifukwa cholephera kuugwira mtima, m’posavuta kuti azingoyambana ndi anzake. Inde, “wosalamulira mtima wake akunga mudzi wopasuka wopanda linga.” (Miyambo 25:28) Eetu, munthu amene amasonyezadi chamuna ndi amene ali wofatsa!

Zitsanzo za M’Baibulo za Kufatsa

Tatiyeni tione chitsanzo cha Yesu Kristu. Iye ananena yekha kuti ndi “wofatsa ndi wodzichepetsa mtima.” (Mateyu 11:29) Sanali munthu wokakala mtima kapena wovuta kapenanso wobwezera choipa. Mtumwi Petro, amene anali mnzake wa Yesu, anasimba kuti: “Yesu pochitidwa chipongwe sanabwezera chipongwe, pakumva zowawa, sanaopsa, koma anapereka mlandu kwa iye woweruza kolungama.” (1 Petro 2:23) Komabe kumbukirani kuti Yesu yemweyo “analoŵa ku kachisi wa Mulungu natulutsira kunja onse akugulitsa ndi kugula malonda.” (Mateyu 21:12) Ndipo Yesu akanati afune kuti Mulungu am’thandize, akanatha kuitanitsa “mabungwe a angelo oposa khumi ndi aŵiri”! (Mateyu 26:53) Ndithudi, Yesu sanali munthu wamantha ngakhale pang’ono.

Taganiziraninso chitsanzo chabwino cha woweruza wotchedwa Gideoni, chimene chinalembedwa m’Baibulo pa Oweruza 8:1-3. Atapambana pa nkhondo yaikulu, asilikali ena a mtundu wa Efraimu zinawaipira chifukwa ankaona kuti sanawaitane kunkhondoyo kuti nawonso adzatamandidwe chifukwa chopambana nkhondoyo. Iwo anakalipa motere, “Ichi watichitira n’chiyani, osatiitana popita iwe kulimbana ndi Amidyani?” Ndipotu ‘anatsutsana naye kolimba.’ Koma Gideoni anali ‘ngwazi yamphamvu.’ (Oweruza 6:12) Akanatha kungomenyana nawo basi chifukwa  chomuyamba chonchi. M’malo mwake iye anawayankha mofatsa ndipo potero anthu osaugwira mtima ameneŵa anatha mphamvu. Gideoni anawafunsa kuti: “Ndachitanji tsopano monga inu?” Kodi zinthu zinayenda bwanji atawayankha modzichepetsa chonchi? ‘Iwo anam’lezera mtima.’

Potsiriza taganizirani nkhani ya m’Baibulo ya mkazi wotchedwa Abigayeli. Davide anali kubisala pothaŵa kuphedwa ndi mdani wake Sauli, mfumu ya Israyeli. Ngakhale kuti anthu a Davide anali m’mavuto chifukwa chothamangitsidwa kwawo, nthaŵi zambiri iwo ankateteza a Israyeli anzawo. Munthu wina amene iwo anam’thandiza anali mwamuna wa Abigayeli wotchedwa Nabala, amene anali munthu wolemera kwambiri. Komabe, Nabala anali “waphunzo ndi woipa machitidwe ake.” Pamene anthu a Davide anali kufuna phoso, anam’pempha Nabala kuti awagaŵireko chakudya. M’malo moyamikira kuti anthu a Davide anam’teteza kwaulere, Nabala “anawakalipira” anthu amene Davideyo anawatuma ndipo anawabweza ali chimanjamanja.—1 Samueli 25:2-11, 14.

Atamva zimenezi, Davide anakwiya ndipo analamula anthu ake kuti: “Yense wa inu amangirire lupanga lake!” Davide ndi anthu ake akupita kokapha Nabala pamodzi ndi amuna onse osalakwa a m’nyumba mwake Abigayeli anawaimitsa. Iye atakumana ndi Davide anam’patsa mphatso ya zakudya ndi zakumwa zambiri mowoloŵa manja. Iye anapepesa chifukwa cha khalidwe loipa la mwamuna wake ndipo anapempha Davide kuti asaphe anthu osalakwawo.—1 Samueli 25:13, 18-31.

Pempho lodzichepetsa la Abigayeli linatsitsa mkwiyo wa Davide. Indedi, pozindikira zoopsa zimene akanachita chifukwa cha ukali, Davide anati: “Alemekezedwe Yehova Mulungu wa Israyeli, amene anakutumiza lero kudzandichingamira ine; ndipo, kudalitsike kuchenjera kwako, nudalitsike iwe, pakuti unandiletsa kusakhetsa mwazi, ndi kusabwezera chilango ndi dzanja la ine ndekha.” (1 Samueli 25:32-35) Inde, nthaŵi zambiri ‘kuyankha mofatsa’ kungathe kuphwetsa mkwiyo wa ena. Koma mungatani ngati munthu atakwiyabe ngakhale mutam’yankha mofatsa?

‘Chokanipo’

Mungathe kupeŵa zambiri pochokapo basi. Baibulo limati, “Posoŵa nkhuni moto ungozima.” Limalangizanso kuti ‘chokanipo musanayambe kukangana.’ (Miyambo 17:14, NW; 26:20) Mtsikana wa zaka 17 wotchedwa Merissa, anati, “Mnyamata wina wotchuka kusukulu anabwera kwa ine kuti alankhule nane. Iye anandiuza kuti ndine wokongola kwambiri. Ndipo nthaŵi yomweyo, mtsikana wina amene anali chibwenzi chake anatulukira atakalipa kwambiri. Anayamba kundinena kuti ndimafuna chibwenzi chakecho ndipo ankafuna kundimenya! Ndinayesa kulongosola zimene zinachitika, koma sizinamveke ayi. Titaŵeruka anatengana ndi anzake ena kuti adzandimenye! Ndinaitana alonda mofulumira, ndipo ndinam’longosolera mtsikana wokwiyayo kuti ine sindichita ndewu ndiponso kuti chibwenzi chakecho n’chimene chinachita kundilondola. Nditamuuza zimenezi ndinachokapo.” Merissa sanachite zinthu mopsa mtima. Sikuti anangothaŵa ndewu chabe komanso anayesetsa kuti adziteteze. N’zogwirizanadi ndi zimene lemba la Miyambo 17:27 limanena kuti, “Wopanda chikamwakamwa apambana kudziŵa; ndipo wofatsa mtima ali wanzeru.”

Kodi nanga mungatani ngati inuyo ndinu amene mwamukwiyitsa munthu winawake, mwina mosadziŵa? Musalimbelimbe, m’pepeseni mwamsanga! N’kutheka kuti mutangotero, munthuyo angakhazikitse mtima pansi. Masiku ano anthu ali n’zambiri zowavuta, ndipo ambiri sachedwa kupsa mtima. Koma mukagwiritsa ntchito mfundo za m’Baibulo pochita zinthu ndi ena, mungapeŵe kuwakwiyitsa.

[Chithunzi patsamba 17]

“Mayankhidwe ofatsa abweza mkwiyo”

[Chithunzi patsamba 18]

Nthaŵi zina ndi bwino kungochokapo