Dzidzisai Vari Kuyaruka Zvichazovabatsira Kana Vakura

IMBOFUNGIDZIRA uchibva kunzvimbo inopisa zvokuti huya uone uchienda kunzvimbo inotonhora zvokuti dzimwe nguva kunomuka kwakachena chando. Ungakwanisa kurarama kunzvimbo yakadaro here? Unogona kurarama, asi pane zvimwe zvinhu zvaunofanira kuita.

Zvataurwa pamusoro apa zvakada kufanana nezvamunozosangana nazvo mwana wenyu paanenge ava pazera rokuyaruka. Zvaiitwa nemwana wenyu zvinongoerekana zvachinja. Mwanakomana wenyu aiwanzoti pamuri ndipo paariwo asi iye zvino ava kufarira kuswera neshamwari dzake. Kana ari musikana aiona sokuti anonokerwa kuti akuudzei zvaswera zvichiitika asi iye zvino ava kungoti gwa gwa.

Munomubvunza kuti: “Kuchikoro kwanga kuri sei?”

Anopindura kuti: “Kwanga kuri right.”

Anobva anyarara.

Munomubvunzazve: “Uri kufungei?”

Anopindura kuti: “Hapana.”

Anotonyanya kunyarara.

Chiiko chiri kumboitika? Kare mwana wenyu aida kukuudzai chose chaanenge ada, asi iye zvino ava kuita sokuti haachadi kukuudzai zvakawanda, uye dzimwe nguva angatoudza vamwe achisiya imi. Zvingaita sokuti hapana chimwe chamuchagona kuita kuti mubatsire mwana wenyu kunze kwokungomutarisa.

Munofanira kukanda mapfumo pasi here? Kwete. Munogona kubatsira vana venyu pavanenge vari pazera rokuyaruka. Danho rokutanga nderokunzwisisa zviri kuitika pamwana wenyu panguva iyi inonakidza asi dzimwe nguva ichitenderedza musoro.

Kuchinja Kubva Pauduku Kuenda Pakuva Munhu Mukuru

Vaongorori vaimbofunga kuti mwana paanozosvika zera remakore mashanu uropi hwake hunenge hwakura zvakakwana. Iye zvino vava kuona kuti ukuru hweuropi hwake hunoti wedzerei zvishoma apfuura pazera iroro uye mafungiro aanoita anochinja zvakanyanya. Vana pavanenge vava pazera rokuyaruka, pane zvinoitika mumuviri wavo zvinoitawo kuti mafungiro avo achinje. Somuenzaniso, vana vaduku vanongobvuma chose chose chavanenge vaudzwa asi kana vava kuyaruka vanenge vava kubvunza kuti sei?, nei?, zvichingodaro. (1 VaKorinde 13:11) Vanotanga kuva nemamwe maonero, uye havanyari kutaura zvavanofunga.

Mumwe murume anonzi Paolo, wokuItaly akaona kuchinja uku pamwana wake akanga achiyaruka. Akati: “Pandinoona zijaya rangu, ndinoona sokuti ndine murume, kwete chikomanawo zvacho. Hachisi chikonzero chokuti ava nemumhu mukuru. Chinonyanya kundishamisa mashandisiro aanoita pfungwa. Haatyi kutaura zvaanofunga kana kuzvitsigira!”

Zvinhu izvi zviri kuitikawo pamwana wako here? Zvimwe mwana wako paaiva achiri muduku, aingobvuma zvose zvawaimuudza. Iye zvino paava kuyaruka, anoda kuziva zvikonzero, uye zvimwe anoda kunzwisisa mitemo iri mumhuri  yenyu. Dzimwe nguva mafungiro ake angatoita somunhu ari kupanduka.

Asi hamufaniri henyu kufunga kuti mwana wenyu ari kuda kuchinja mitemo yenyu. Angave ari kuedza kuona kuti mitemo yevabereki vake ingakwana papi muupenyu hwake uye kuti angaishandisa sei. Izvi tingazvifananidza nemunhu ari kutama kuenda kunogara pane imwe imba uye ari kuenda nemidziyo yake yose. Kurongedza mudziyo mumwe nomumwe muimba itsva kuchamuitira nyore here? Kazhinji hazvisi nyore. Asi chokwadi ndechokuti hapana chaanozorasa pane midziyo yake yaanokoshesa.

Ndizvowo zvinoitika kumwana ari kuyaruka paanenge achigadzirira kuzosiya “baba vake naamai vake.” (Genesisi 2:24) Ichokwadi kuti mwana wenyu parizvino achiri muduku, haasati akura zvokubva pamba. Asi tingatoti anenge atotanga kurongedza achigadzirira kutama. Pazera rokubva pamakore anenge 13 kusvika peanenge 19, anenge achiongorora mitemo yaakakura achidzidziswa, uye anenge achisarudza kuti ndeipi yaachazoshandisa kana ava munhu mukuru. *

Kufunga kuti mwana wenyu achaita zvisarudzo zvakadaro kunogona kukuvhundutsai. Kunyange hazvo zvakadaro, munogona kuva nechokwadi chokuti paanozokura, achangoshandisa zvamakamudzidzisa zvaanoona kuti zvinokosha. Saka iye zvino mwana wenyu paanenge achiri pamba, ndiyo nguva yokuti anyatsoongorora zvamakamudzidzisa zvaachashandisa paanenge ava ega.—Mabasa 17:11.

Kutaura chokwadi zvinenge zvichiitwa nemwana wenyu izvi zvinobatsira. Pakuti akabvuma zvose zvose zvamunotaura asingabvunzi, mangwana paanenge akura ndizvo zvaachangoita pane zvinotaurwa nevamwe. (Eksodho 23:2) Bhaibheri rinotsanangura kuti wechiduku akadaro ari nyore kufurirwa nokuti ane “mwoyo usina njere.” Dzimwe nguva mashoko aya anoreva kuita zvinhu usingashandisi ungwaru. (Zvirevo 7:7) Wechiduku asina chokwadi nezvaanofunga anogona ‘kukandwa kwose kwose sokunge anokandwa nemafungu uye achitakurirwa kuno nokoko nemhepo yose yokudzidzisa nounyengeri hwevanhu.’—VaEfeso 4:14.

Mungaita sei kuti izvi zvisaitika kumwana wenyu? Ivai nechokwadi chokuti ane zvinhu zvitatu izvi:

1 SIMBA ROKUNZWISISA

Muapostora Pauro akanyora kuti, “Vanhu vakuru . . . vanoita kuti simba ravo rokunzwisisa rirovedzwe kusiyanisa zvakanaka nezvakaipa.” (VaHebheru 5:14) Zvimwe ungati, ‘Asi inga wani ndakadzidzisa mwana wangu kusiyanisa chakanaka nechakaipa.’ Hongu, ndizvozvo kuti makamudzidzisa uye zvakamubatsira panguva iyoyo kusvikira pari zvino. (2 Timoti 3:14) Asi Pauro akati vanhu vanofanira kurovedza masimba okunzwisisa. Vana vaduku vangadzidza chakanaka nechakaipa, asi vari kuyaruka vanofanira kukura “zvakakwana pasimba rokunzwisisa.” (1 VaKorinde 14:20; Zvirevo 1:4; 2:11) Hamudi  kuti mwana wenyu ari kuyaruka asangobvuma asina kumboonawo kuti zvinhu zvakamira sei, asi munoda kuti ashandise pfungwa dzake. (VaRoma 12:1, 2) Mungamubatsira sei kuti ashandise pfungwa dzake?

Chimwe chamungaita kumurega achitaura zvaanofunga. Musamudimbudzira paanenge achitaura, uye edzai nepamunogona napo kusagumbuka, kunyange akataura zvisingakufadzei. Bhaibheri rinoti ‘kurumidzai kunzwa, munonoke kutaura, mononoka kuva nehasha.’ (Jakobho 1:19; Zvirevo 18:13) Uyezve Jesu akati: “Muromo unotaura zvinobva pazvizhinji zviri mumwoyo.” (Mateu 12:34) Mukateerera, muchagona kuziva zviri kunyatsonetsa mwana wenyu ari kuyaruka.

Pamunotaura, edzai kubvunza mibvunzo pane kungopotsera mashoko. Dzimwe nguva Jesu aibvunza kuti “Munofungei?” achiita kuti vadzidzi vake vataure zvavaifunga uye kunyange vaya vakanga vakaoma musoro. (Mateu 21:23, 28) Ndizvowo zvamunogona kuita kumwana wenyu ari kuyaruka, kunyange paanotaura zvinopesana nezvamuri kufunga. Somuenzaniso:

Kana mwana wenyu akati: “Ini handifungi kuti Mwari ariko.”

Pane kumupindura kuti: “Takakudzidzisa zvakawanda pamusoro paMwari, saka hapana chingaita kuti ufunge kuti haako!”

Mungamupindura muchiti: “Sei uchidaro?”

Nei muchifanira kuita kuti mwana wenyu ataure zvaanofunga? Zvaanenge ataura munenge mazvinzwa, chasara kuziva kuti chii chiri kuita kuti afunge saizvozvo. (Zvirevo 20:5) Chingava chiri kumunetsa inyaya yemitemo yaMwari kwete kuti haana chokwadi kana Mwari ariko.

Somuenzaniso, wechiduku paanoona zvichimuomera kuti ateerere mitemo yaMwari panyaya dzetsika angaedza kuzviudza kuti Mwari haako kuitira kuti aite zvaanoda. (Pisarema 14:1) Saka mupfungwa dzake anenge ava kuzviudza kuti, ‘Kana Mwari asiko, hapana chikonzero chokurarama zvinoenderana nezvinotaurwa neBhaibheri.’

Kana mwana wenyu ari kuyaruka akaita seane mafungiro akadaro, anofanira kufunga nezvemubvunzo wokuti, Ndinonyatsotenda here kuti mitemo yaMwari yakandinakira? (Isaya 48:17, 18) Kana achibvuma kuti yakamunakira, mukurudzirei kuti achiitevedzera kuti zvinhu zvimufambire zvakanaka.—VaGaratiya 5:1.

Kana mwana wenyu akati: “Chitendero ichi ndechenyu saka hazvirevi kuti neniwo ndicho chandinofanira kupinda.”

Pane kumupindura kuti: “Iwe uri mwana wedu, saka chitendero ichi ndechedu tose, uye zvatinenge takuudza ndizvo zvaunofanira kutenda.”

Mungamupindura kuti: “Wataura chokwadi chiri mumwoyo mako. Asi kana usingadi zvandinotenda, unofanira kuva nezvakowo zvaunotenda. Saka zvako ndezvipi? Panyaya dzetsika ndeipi mitemo yaunofunga kuti ndiyo yakanaka kutevedzera?”

Nei muchifanira kuita kuti mwana wenyu ataure zvaanofunga? Kukurukura naye seizvi kunomubatsira kuti aongorore mafungiro ake. Angatoshamisika kuona kuti zvaanotenda nezvamunotenda zvimwe chete asi kuti pane chimwewo chinhu chiri kunyanya kumunetsa.

Somuenzaniso, zvimwe mwana wenyu haazivi  kuti angatsanangurira sei vamwe zvaanotenda. (VaKorose 4:6; 1 Petro 3:15) Kana ari mukomana angangova ari kutorwa mwoyo nemumwe musikana asiri wechitendero chake. Tsvakai zviri kukonzera dambudziko racho, uye mubatsirei kuti azvionewo. Paanoramba achishandisa simba rake rokunzwisisa, zvichamubatsira paanenge akura.

2 KUBATSIRWA NEMUNHU MUKURU

Vamwe vaongorori vepfungwa vanoti vana pavanenge vari mumazera okuyaruka pane kuchinja kunovhiringidza kunoitika mavari. Asi mune dzimwe tsika kuchinja uku kunooneka zvishoma kana kuti hakutombobviri kwaoneka. Vaongorori vakaona kuti munharaunda dzakadaro vechiduku vanenge vava kutorarama upenyu hwevanhu vakuru vachiri pazera duku. Vanoshanda nevanhu vakuru, vanowadzana navo, uye vanopiwa mabasa evanhu vakuru. Saka mashoko anorondedzera zvinoitwa nevechiduku akadai sokuti “mafungiro evechiduku,” “misikanzwa inoitwa nevechiduku” kunyange “vari kuyaruka” haatombonzwiwi.

Kusiyana nezvataona izvi, munyika dzakawanda vechiduku vanodzidza muzvikoro zvine vana vakawandisa uye vanhu vavanoswera vachiwadzana navo ndevezera ravo. Pavanodzoka kumba vanosvika kusina vanhu. Baba naamai vari kubasa. Veukama vanogara kure. Vezera ravo chete ndivo vavanogona kutowadzana navo. * Munoona dambudziko racho here? Haisi nyaya yokungoti vanotamba nevanhu vasiri ivo. Vaongorori vakaona kuti kunyange vechiduku vanoita zvakanaka vanogona kupedzisira vaita misikanzwa kana vasingambowani nguva yokuvawo nevanhu vakuru.

Rumwe rudzi rwakanga rusingaparadzanisi vechiduku nevanhu vakuru nderwevaIsraeri vekare. Somuenzaniso, Bhaibheri rinotaura nezvaUziya, uyo akazova mambo waJudha ari pazera rokuyaruka. Chii chakabatsira Uziya kuti aite basa rakakura kudaro? Zvinoratidza sokuti rumwe rubatsiro akarwuwana kumurume ainzi Zekariya, uyo anotsanangurwa neBhaibheri kuti “murayiridzi aidzidzisa kutya Mwari wechokwadi.”—2 Makoronike 26:5.

Mwana wenyu ari kuyaruka ane shamwari yechikuru ine mafungiro akafanana neenyu here? Kana mwana wenyu atanga kushamwaridzana nevanhu vakuru vakadaro musamutyira. Ushamwari hwakadaro hunobatsira mwana wenyu kuti aite zvakarurama. Chimwe chirevo cheBhaibheri chinoti: “Munhu anofamba nevanhu vakachenjera achava akachenjera.”—Zvirevo 13:20.

3 KUGONA KUZVISHANDIRA

Mune dzimwe nyika, pane maawa akatarwa nemitemo anonzi haafaniri kupfuurwa nevana pavanenge vachishanda uye pane mamwe mabasa avasingafaniri kuita. Kubudirira mune zveupfumi kwakaitika muzana remakore rechi18 uye rechi19 kwakazokonzera kuti mamwe mashandiro ave nengozi. Saka pakaiswa mitemo yaizodzivirira vana pamashandiro akadaro.

Kunyange zvazvo mitemo iyi ichidzivirira vana kuti vasashandiswa zvakapfurikidza, vamwe vanoti izvi zvinozopedzisira zvaita kuti vana  vagarire maoko. Rimwe bhuku rinonzi Escaping the Endless Adolescence, rinoti chiri kupedzisira chaitika ndechokuti vana vakawanda vari kuyaruka vava “nekapfungwa kokuti vane kodzero yokuwana zvose zvavanoda vasina kana kumbozvibudira ziya.” Vakanyora bhuku iri vanoti mafungiro aya “anoita kuti vechiduku vaone sokuti ndizvo zvinofanira kuitwa munyika ino inonyanya kuda kufadza vari kuyaruka kupfuura kutarisira kuti vaite chimwe chinhu.”

Zvisinei, Bhaibheri rinotiudza nezvevamwe vakatanga kuita mabasa akakura vachiri kuyaruka. Funga nezvaTimoti uyo anofanira kunge akanga asati asvitsa makore 20 paakasangana nomurume akamukurudzira kuita zvakanaka ainzi Pauro. Pava paya muapostora Pauro akaudza Timoti kuti ‘akuchidzire chipo chaMwari chaiva maari sezvinoitwa moto,’ kana kuti aise mwoyo wake uye ashande nesimba pabasa raakanga apiwa. (2 Timoti 1:6) Paakanga ava nemakore okuma20, Timoti akabva pamba ndokufamba naPauro achimubatsira kutanga ungano uye kukurudzira hama. Ashanda naTimoti kweanenge makore gumi, Pauro akakwanisa kuudza vaKristu vaiva muFiripi kuti: “Handina mumwezve ane kufunga kwakafanana nokwake achatarisira zvinhu zvine chokuita nemi nomwoyo wose.”—VaFiripi 2:20.

Kakawanda vechiduku vanonakidzwa nokushanda, kunyanya kana basa racho richinakidza uye vachiona chimwe chinhu chakanaka chinobudapo. Izvi hazvingogumiri pakuvabatsira kuti vagone kuzozvishandira mune ramangwana asi zvinoita kuti vaone zvakanaka zvavanogona kuita iye zvino.

Kukwanisa Kurera Mwana Ari Kuyaruka

Sezvambotaurwa patangira nyaya ino, kana uri mubereki ari kurera mwana ari kuyaruka, zvinoita sokuti wava kune imwe “nzvimbo inotonhora” kudarika kwawaimbova mumakore apfuura. Iva nechokwadi chokuti unokwanisa kurera mwana wako sezvawaiita pakukura kwake.

Mwana wako paanenge achiyaruka, mukana wokuti (1) umubatsire kuti ave nesimba rokunzwisisa, (2) umuratidze kuti angararama sei, uye (3) umudzidzise kuzviraramira. Kana ukaita izvi, uchabatsira mwana wako ari kuyaruka kuti azove munhu mukuru.

[Mashoko Omuzasi]

[Bhokisi/Mufananidzo uri papeji 20]

“Handifungi Kuti Ndaizova Nevamwe Vabereki Vakanaka Kudarika Vandinavo”

Zvapupu zvaJehovha zvinodzidzisa vana vazvo kuti vararame zvinoenderana nezvinodzidziswa neBhaibheri uye zvinovadzidzisa neshoko nezviito. (VaEfeso 6:4) Asi havaiti zvokuvamanikidza. Vanoziva kuti vana vavo vane kodzero yokusarudza mararamiro avanoda pavanokura.

Aislyn ane makore 18, ari kurarama achitevedzera zvaakakura achidzidziswa nevabereki vake. Anoti: “Handirarami zvinoenderana nechitendero changu kwezuva rimwe chete pavhiki. Ndihwo hunotova upenyu hwangu. Zvandinodzidza muchitendero changu ndizvo zvinondibatsira pakuita zvisarudzo zvangu zvose muupenyu. Zvimwe zvacho zvinosanganisira kusarudza vanhu vandinoshamwaridzana navo uye mabhuku andinoverenga.”

Aislyn anoonga chaizvo kurerwa kwaakaitwa nevabereki vechiKristu. Anoti: “Handifungi kuti ndaizova nevamwe vabereki vakanaka kudarika vandinavo, uye ndakakomborerwa nokuti vaigara vachindidzidzisa kuti ndirambe ndiri mumwe weZvapupu zvaJehovha. Zvandakadzidziswa nevabereki vangu zvicharamba zvichinditungamirira kweupenyu hwangu hwose.”

[Mufananidzo uri papeji 17]

Rega mwana wako ataure

[Mufananidzo uri papeji 18]

Munhu mukuru anogona kubatsira mwana wako

[Mufananidzo uri papeji 19]

Kuita basa kunobatsira vari kuyaruka kuti vazova vanhu vakuru vanokwanisa kuzviraramira