Ŵakutorana ŵanyake awo ŵakupulikana yayi mu nthengwa yawo ŵakughanaghana kuti para ŵangalekana vingawovwira ŵana ŵawo—ŵakuti ŵana vingaŵaŵira makora chomene kuluska kukhala na ŵapapi ŵaŵiri awo ŵakukhalira kwambana. Kasi ukaboni ukulongora vichi?

•  Kasi ŵana ŵakukhwaskika wuli para ŵapapi ŵalekana?

•  Kasi mwana wane waŵenge wakukondwa para talekana na mfumu panji muwoli wane?

•  Wuli pa nkhani ya kupeleka waka wovwiri ku ŵana para talekana?

•  Kasi pali nthowa yiwemi yakumazgira masuzgo mu nthengwa?

 Kafukufuku wakulongora kuti ŵana ŵakuyungwa para ŵapapi ŵawo ŵalekana. Ŵana awo ŵapapi ŵawo ŵalekana kanandi:

•   ŵakuŵa ŵakali, ŵakwenjerwa chomene, na ŵachitima

•   ŵakwamba nkharo ziheni

•   ŵakuweramo waka mu kilasi panji ŵakuleka sukulu

•   ŵakukaŵa yayi kulwara

 Chinyake ntchakuti, ŵana ŵanandi ŵakujipa mulandu para ŵapapi ŵawo ŵalekana, ŵakughanaghana kuti ndiwo ŵapangiska panji mphanyi ŵakawovwirapo kuti ivi vileke kuchitika.

 Para ŵapapi ŵalekana, ŵana ŵangasuzgika m’paka ku ulara, ndipo ŵangajiwona kuti mbambura kukhumbikwa kweniso vingaŵasuzga kugomezga ŵanthu. Para ŵatora panji kutengwa nawo ŵangakaŵa yayi kuchimbiramo mu nthengwa usange muli masuzgo.

 Fundo yikuru: Nangauli ŵapapi ŵanyake awo ŵakughanaghana vya kulekana ŵakuwona kuti viwovwirenge ŵana ŵawo, ukaboni ukulongora kuti uwu mbutesi. Nkhwantha pa nkhani za ŵana Penelope Leach wali kulemba kuti: “Ŵana ŵakuhangayika para ŵapapi ŵawo ŵalekana.” a

 Fundo ya mu Baibolo: “Kulaŵiska pa ivyo imwe mukukhumba pera yayi, kweniso ivyo ŵanyinu ŵakukhumba.”—Ŵafilipi 2:4.

 Ŵanyake ŵangazgora kuti enya. Kweni kumbukani kuti ivyo ŵapapi ŵakukhumba kanandi vikuyana yayi na ivyo ŵana ŵakukhumba. Munthu uyo wakughanaghana kuti nthengwa yimare wakukhumba kuti wakawone umoyo unyake. Mwana wakukhumba yayi kuluza umoyo wa kuŵa na Dada kweniso Mama.

 Ŵati ŵafumba ŵanthu ŵanandi awo ŵali kulekana, ŵenecho ŵa buku lakuti The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce ŵakalemba kuti: “Chimoza icho tawona ntchakuti: ŵana ŵakuti mbakukondwa yayi. Kweni mwambura kubisa ŵakuti, ‘Zuŵa ilo ŵapapi ŵane ŵakalekerana ndilo zuŵa ilo umoyo wane ukatimbanizgikira.’” Buku ili likutiso ŵana aŵa ŵakuwona charu kuŵa “chambura kugomezgeka, kweniso chakofya chomene chifukwa chakuti ŵanthu ŵaŵiri awo iwo ŵakuwona kuti ŵakwenera kupulikana ŵatondeka kukhalira lumoza.”

 Fundo yikuru: Vingachitika yayi kuti ŵana ŵaŵe ŵakukondwa para ŵapapi ŵawo ŵalekana.

 Fundo ya mu Baibolo: “Mzimu wakuphyoka ukukamuska nkhongono.”—Zintharika 17:22.

 Ŵanthu ŵanyake awo ŵali kulekana ŵakuyezga kovwirana waka kulera ŵana ŵawo nga ni para ŵachali lumoza mu nthengwa. Ndipouli, nthowa iyi njakusuzga. Ukaboni ukulongora kuti ŵapapi awo ŵalekana kanandi:

•   ŵakuchezga na ŵana ŵawo nyengo yichoko chomene

•   ŵakusambizga ŵana ŵawo fundo zakupambana

•   ŵakuzomerezga ŵana kuchita waka chilichose icho ŵakhumba chifukwa mupapi wakujipa mulandu panji wavuka chomene

 Mwana uyo ŵapapi ŵake ŵalekana wangaleka kupulikira ŵapapi ŵake. Nakuti wangawona kuti ŵapapi ŵake ŵali kutondeka kukoleska fundo ziwemi nga nkhusunga phangano la nthengwa panji kugomezgana. Mwana wangaghanaghana kuti, ‘So nisuzgikirechi na kuŵapulikira?’

 Fundo yikuru: Kovwirana waka kulera ŵana nkhwakusuzga ku ŵapapi awo ŵalekana. Kweni ku ŵana, ndiko nkhwakusuzga chomene.

 Fundo ya mu Baibolo: “Lekani kukwiyiska ŵana ŵinu, mwakuti ŵaleke kugongoweskeka.”—Ŵakolose 3:21, mazgu ghamusi.

 Kanandi para ŵanthu ŵalekana ŵakulimbikira chomene kuti vinthu vyambe kwendaso makora pa umoyo wawo. Ntheura chingaŵa chiwemi kuti ŵalimbikire chomene kuti ŵamazge masuzgo mu nthengwa yawo na kulutilira kukhalira lumoza. Buku lakuti The Case for Marriage likuti, “Pakuti nthengwa yinu yikwenda makora yayi, chikung’anamura kuti yilekenge kwenda makora m’paka muyirayira yayi. Para pajumpha nyengo, nthengwa zinandi izo pakwamba zikendanga makora yayi pamanyuma zikwenda makora ndipo wose ŵakukondwa.” Chikuru chomene ntchakuti ŵana ŵakukura makora para ŵakukhala na ŵapapi wose ŵaŵiri.

 Ichi kuti chikung’anamura kuti ŵakutorana ŵalekerethu kusankha kulekana yayi. Nakuti Baibolo likuzomerezga ŵanthu kulekana pekha para yumoza mu nthengwa waleŵa. (Mateyu 19:9) Ndipouli, Baibolo likuyowoyaso kuti “wakuchenjera wakulanguruka pa mendero ghake ghose.” (Zintharika 14:15) Mfumu na muwoli awo ŵakupulikana yayi mu nthengwa yawo ŵakwenera kughanaghanira fundo zose—kusazgapo umo ŵana ŵawo ŵakhwaskikirenge para iwo ŵalekana.

 Apa nkhani njakuti ŵazizipizge waka yayi. Mu Baibolo muli fundo ziwemi chomene zakovwira mfumu na muwoli kuŵa na makhaliro ghakukhumbikwa kuti nthengwa yawo yiŵe yakukhora na yakukondweska. Ichi ntchakuzizika yayi chifukwa Yehova, uyo ni Mwenecho wa Baibolo, ndiyo wakambiska nthengwa.—Mateyu 19:4-6.

 Fundo ya mu Baibolo: “Ine Yehova, ndine Chiuta winu, Uyo wakumusambizgani kuti musange chandulo.”—Yesaya 48:17.