Ugqiba kuxabana neqabane lakho. Uzixelela ukuba, ‘Andinyanzelekanga ukuba ndixolise.’ ‘Ingendim nje oyiqalileyo!’

Niyayeka ukuxambulisana, kodwa nisaqumbelene. Uyakucinga kona ukucela uxolo, kodwa amazwi athi “ndiyaxolisa” omel’ emqaleni.

Likratshi. UCharles oyindoda etshatileyo uthi, “Ngamany’ amaxesha kuba nzima ukuthi ‘uxolo’ kuba ndiye ndonganyelwe likratshi.” * Ikratshi lingenza kube ngathi kulihlazo gqitha ukuvuma ukuba nawe unetyala.

Imbono. Usenokucinga ukuba umele ucele uxolo kuphela xa unetyala. Inkosikazi enguJill ithi: “Xa ndisazi ukuba nyhani ndonile, kuba lula ukuthi ‘ndicela uxolo.’ Kodwa xa siye sathetha amazwi arhabaxa sobabini, kuye kube nzima. Kutheni ke nyhani kufuneka ibe ndim oxolisayo ukuba sinetyala sobabini?”

Usenokucinga ukuba unesizathu esivakalayo sokungaxolisi xa iliqabane lakho elinetyala. UJoseph oyindoda etshatileyo uthi: “Xa ucinga ukuba awenzanga nto, ukungaceli xolo kuba yindlela obonisa ngayo ukuba umsulwa.”

Indlela okhuliswe ngayo. Mhlawumbi ukhulele kwikhaya apho bekungafane kucelwe xolo. Ukuba kunjalo, kusenokwenzeka ukuba awuzange ufunde ukuvuma xa wonile. Kusenokuba nzima ukuqhela ukuxolisa ngokusuka entliziyweni xa ungazange ukufunde usemncinci.

Cinga ngeqabane lakho. Zama ukucinga ngexesha laxa omnye umntu wakha wacela uxolo kuwe nendlela owavakalelwa ngayo. Kutheni ungenzi neqabane lakho livakalelwe ngolo hlobo? Nokuba ucinga ukuba awenzanga nto, usenokucela uxolo ngokulikhathaza okanye ngokulimosha ungaqondanga. Amazwi anjalo angalinceda lixole.—Umgaqo weBhayibhile: Luka 6:31.

Cinga ngomtshato wakho. Musa ukuvakalelwa kukuba ukuxolisa kuthoba wena, kunoko, kujonge njengokunceda umtshato wakho uphumelele. Kaloku, iMizekeliso 18:19 ithi umntu ohlala equmbile ulukhuni ‘ngaphezu kwedolophu eyomeleleyo.’ Kunzima kakhulu ukuba kubekho uxolo xa nisoloko nifuna ukuzithethelela. Kwelinye icala, xa ucela uxolo ucima umlilo obunokubangelwa yiloo ngxaki. Lilonke, umtshato mawubaluleke ngaphezu kwesiqu sakho.—Umgaqo weBhayibhile: Filipi 2:3.

Cela uxolo ngokukhawuleza. Liyinyaniso elokuba kusenokubanzima ukuxolisa xa ingelotyala lakho ngokupheleleyo. Kodwa ukucatshukiswa liqabane lakho akuthi yiba ndlongondlongo. Ngoko ke, cela uxolo ngokukhawuleza, ungacingi ukuba liza kuxola ngokuya kuhamba ixesha. Ukucela uxolo kunokwenza kube lula nakwiqabane lakho ukukwazi ukulucela. Ngokuya uqhela ukuxolisa, kuza kuya kusiba lula ukulucela.—Umgaqo weBhayibhile: Mateyu 5:25.

Bonisa ukuba ulucela ngokwenene. Ukuzithethelela akufani nokucela uxolo. Nokudlulisa nje usana kunina ngokuthi, “Uxolo ke ukuba ukhathazekile” asiyondlela ifanelekileyo yokucela uxolo kwaphela! Livume ityala nentlungu oyibangele kwiqabane lakho, enoba uyayikholelwa loo nto okanye akunjalo.

Yivume inyaniso. Vuma ukuba uza kuzenza iimpazamo njengamntu wonke! Nokuba ucinga ukuba awunatyala, yazi ukuba into oyicingayo kusenokwenzeka ukuba asiyiyo eyona yenzekileyo. IBhayibhile ithi, “Othetha kuqala kwelakhe ityala ulilungisa; yaye idlelane lakhe ngokuqinisekeliyo lifika limgocagoce.” (IMizekeliso 18:17) Ukuba uyayamkela into yokuba ukhe uzenze iimpazamo, uya kukubona kubalulekile ukucela uxolo.