XA BENIKWA isabelo sentetho, abaninzi baye bazibhokoxe ngokuyibhala phantsi, beqala ngentshayelelo baze baye kutsho kumqukumbelo wayo. Basenokubhala amaphepha aliqela ngaphambi kokuba bayigqibe loo ntetho. Loo nto isenokuthabatha iiyure.

Ngaba nawe uzilungiselela ngolo hlobo iintetho zakho? Akungethandi ukufunda indlela elulana yokulungiselela? Ukuba ufunda indlela yokwenza ulwandlalo, akuyi kuba yimfuneko ukuba ubhale yonke into phantsi. Uya kutsho ube nethuba elingakumbi lokuqhelisela indlela yokuyinikela loo ntetho. Iintetho zakho aziyi kwanela nje ukuba lula kodwa kuya kuba mnandi nangakumbi ukuziphulaphula yaye ziya kubashukumisa abo bakuphulaphuleyo.

Kakade ke, iintetho zesidlangalala ezinikelwa ebandleni ziba nolwandlalo olusisiseko olulungiselelweyo. Noko ke, inkoliso yezinye iintetho ayinalo. Unokwabelwa ukuba unikele intetho ngombandela okanye ngomxholo othile kuphela. Okanye usenokucelwa ukuba ugubungele umbandela othile oshicilelweyo. Maxa wambi usenokunikwa nje imiyalelo embalwa. Kuzo zonke ezo zabelo, kufuneka uzenzele ulwandlalo lwakho.

Umzekelo okwiphepha 41 uya kukubonisa indlela yokwenza ulwandlalo olufutshane. Phawula ukuba ingongoma nganye eyintloko iqala eludinini olusekhohlo kwaye ibhalwa ngoonobumba abakhulu. Ngaphantsi kwengongoma nganye kudweliswe iingcamango eziyixhasayo. Kukho iingongoma ezongezelekileyo eziza kusetyenziswa xa kuxutyushwa ezo ngcamango, zidweliswe ngaphantsi kwazo kwaye zenziwe zanezikhewu eludinini olungasekhohlo. Khawuluhlolisise kakuhle olu lwandlalo. Phawula ukuba iingongoma ezimbini eziyintloko zinxibelelene ngokungqalileyo nomxholo. Kwakhona phawula ukuba iingongoma ezingaphantsi aziyomibandela nje ebangel’ umdla. Kunoko, nganye ixhasa ingongoma eyintloko evela phantsi kwayo.

Xa usenza ulwandlalo, lusenokungafani ncam nolu lungumzekelo. Kodwa ke ukuba uyayifumana eyona migaqo ibandakanyekileyo, luya kukunceda uhlengahlengise umbandela wakho uze ulungiselele intetho emnandi ngexesha elisengqiqweni. Ufanele wenze njani?

Kufuneka ube nomxholo. Umxholo wakho awungombandela nje ophangaleleyo ofana nalowo unokumelwa ligama elinye. Uyingcamango eyintloko ofuna ukuyidlulisela, kwaye ubonisa icala ofuna ukuwungena  ngalo loo mbandela. Xa uwunikiwe umxholo, hlahlela igama eliyintloko ngalinye. Ukuba kufuneka ulungiselele umxholo othile owunikiweyo osekelwe kumbandela oshicilelweyo, wufundisise loo mbandela ucinga ngaloo mxholo. Ukuba unikwe umbandela nje kuphela, kukuwe ukuzikhethela umxholo. Noko ke, ngaphambi kokuba uwukhethe, unokukufumanisa kuluncedo ukwenza uphando. Ngokugcina ingqondo yakho iphangalele, kuya kuba lula ukuba ufumane iingcamango ezintsha.

Njengoko uthabatha la manyathelo, hlala uzibuza ukuba: ‘Kutheni lo mbandela ubalulekile kubaphulaphuli bam? Luyintoni usukelo lwam?’ Alufanelanga lube kukugubungela nje umbandela okanye ukunikela intetho eyahlukileyo, kodwa lufanele lube kukuphumeza into eza kuba yingenelo kwabo bakuphulaphuleyo. Wakuba uluqondile usukelo lwakho, lubhale phantsi. Qhubeka uzikhumbuza ngalo njengoko ulungiselela.

Wakuba ulufumene usukelo yaye uwukhethile umxholo ohambisana nalo (okanye uyihlahlele indlela umxholo owabelweyo ongena ngayo kolo sukelo), unokwenza uphando olujoliswe kumbandela othile. Khangela umbandela oza kuba yingenelo ngokukhethekileyo kwabo baza kube bekuphulaphule. Mus’ ukuthabatha iingongoma ezingangqalanga, kunoko khangela iingongoma ezihlab’ emxholweni eziqulethe inkcazelo neziluncedo ngokwenene. Mawube sengqiqweni umlinganiselo wophando olwenzayo. Kwiimeko ezininzi uya kukhawuleza ube nombandela ongaphezu kwalowo unokuwusebenzisa, ngoko kufuneka ukhethe.

Khetha iingongoma eziziintloko ofuna ukuzixubusha ukuze uphuhlise umxholo wakho nokuze ufikelele usukelo lwakho. Ezi ngongoma ziza kuba sisiseko sakho, umongo wolwandlalo lwakho. Zifanele zibe ngaphi iingongoma eziziintloko kolu lwandlalo? Mhlawumbi ezimbini zanele xa usenza ingxubusho emfutshane, yaye ezintlanu zidla ngokwanela kwanakwintetho ethabatha iyure. Okukhona zimbalwa iingongoma, kokukhona kuya kuba lula ukuba abaphulaphuli bakho bazikhumbule.

Wakuba uwukhethile umxholo kunye neengongoma eziziintloko oza kuzisebenzisa, hlengahlengisa umbandela owufumene xa ubusenza uphando. Khetha lowo udibana ngokungqalileyo neengongoma zakho eziziintloko. Khetha iinkcukacha eziya kuyenza ibangel’ umdla intetho yakho. Xa ukhetha izibhalo zokuxhasa iingongoma eziziintloko, phawula iingcamango eziya kukunceda uqiqe ngendlela  enentsingiselo ngezo ndinyana. Inkcukacha nganye yifake phantsi kwengongoma eyintloko yayo. Ukuba enye inkcazelo ayingeni nakwenye kwiingongoma zakho eziziintloko, yilahle kude—kwanokuba ibangel’ umdla—okanye ke yigcine efayileni ukuze uyisebenzise ngenye imini. Gcina owona mbandela ulungileyo kuphela. Ukuba uzama ukugubungela umbandela omninzi, kuza kufuneka uyileqe intetho yakho ibe akuyi kuyigubungela ngokucokisekileyo. Kubhetele udlulisele iingongoma ezimbalwa ezibaluleke ngokwenene kubaphulaphuli yaye uzidlulisele ngobunono. Ungatyi ixesha.

Ngoku hlengahlengisa umbandela wakho ngokolungelelwano olucwangcisiweyo, ukuba akukayenzi phofu loo nto. Umbhali wencwadi yeVangeli uLuka wayenza loo nto. Akuba eqokelele izibakala ezininzi eziphathelele umbandela wakhe, wawubhala “ngolungelelwano olucwangcisiweyo.” (Luka 1:3) Unokuwudwelisa umbandela wakho ngokokulandelelana kwamaxesha okanye ngokwemixholo, mhlawumbi ubeke unobangela nomphumo okanye ingxaki nesicombululo, kuxhomekeka kweyona ndlela isebenzayo ukuze ufikelele usukelo lwakho. Ungasuki utshintshe nje ngokukhawuleza usuka kwenye ingcamango usiya kwenye. Abaphulaphuli bakho ufanele ubakhokele ngendlela elula ukusuka kwenye ingcamango ukuya kwenye, kungabikho zikhewu ezingayi kuvaleka lula. Ubungqina obunikelwayo bufanele bukhokelele abaphulaphuli kwisigqibo esisengqiqweni. Njengoko uhlengahlengisa iingongoma zakho, cinga ngendlela intetho yakho eya kuvakala ngayo kubaphulaphuli bakho. Ngaba baya kuzilandela lula iingcamango ozivezayo? Ngaba baya kushukuyiselwa ekukwenzeni oko bakuvayo, ngokuvisisana nosukelo onalo wena engqondweni yakho?

Emva koku, lungiselela intshayelelo evus’ umdla kumbandela wakho nebonisa abaphulaphuli ukuba oko uza kukuxubusha kubaluleke ngokwenene kubo. Kunokukunceda ukuzibhala phantsi izivakalisi zakho zokuqala  ezimbalwa. Ekugqibeleni, ceba umqukumbelo oshukumisayo ovisisana nosukelo lwakho.

Ukuba ulungiselela usenethuba elaneleyo, uya kufumana nexesha lokuyiphucula intetho yakho ngaphambi kokuba uyinikele. Usenokubona imfuneko yokuxhasa iingcamango ezithile ngamanani, ngemizekeliso okanye ngamava. Ukusebenzisa isiganeko esenzekayo okanye umbandela othile othimb’ ingqalelo yabantu basekuhlaleni kunokubanceda abaphulaphuli bakho bayibone lula imbaluleka yaloo mbandela. Njengoko uyihlola kwakhona intetho yakho, unokubona amathuba angakumbi okwenza loo nkcazelo ifanele abaphulaphuli bakho. Ukuhlahlela nokuphucula kungundoqo xa usenza umbandela omnandi ube yintetho eyakhayo.

Ezinye izithethi zisenokufuna amanqaku amaninzi kunezinye. Kodwa ukuba ulungiselela umbandela wakho phantsi kweengongoma ezimbalwa eziziintloko, zikhuphe ezingawuxhasiyo loo mbandela, uze ubeke iingongoma zakho ngolungelelwano olucwangcisiweyo, uya kufumanisa ukuba njengoko usiba namava, akuyi kuba yimfuneko ukuba ubhale yonke into. Hayi indlela elonga ngayo ixesha loo nto! Kwaye neentetho zakho ziya kuphucula. Kuya kucaca ukuba ngokwenene uyangenelwa kwimfundo yeSikolo Sobulungiseleli Sobuthixo.